Canberra freezing.

+25°C: Queenslanders turn on the heat. Melbournians sunbathe.
+10°C: Melbournians turn on the heat. People in Tasmania plant gardens.
+5°C: Sydney residents shiver uncontrollably. People in Canberra go swimming.
+2°C: Italian cars won't start. People in Canberra drive with the windows open.
0°C: Distilled water freezes. Canberra water gets thicker.
-7°C: Sydney people wear coats, gloves, and wool hats. People in Canberra throw on a T-shirt.
-9°C: Queenslanders begin to evacuate the state. People in Canberra go camping.
-18°C: Melbourne landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Canberra have a last BBQ before it gets cold.
-23°C: People in Perth cease to exist. People in Canberra lick flagpoles.
-29°C: Sydney people fly away to South Pacific islands. People in Canberra throw on a light jacket.
-40°C: Darwin disintegrates. People in Canberra rent videos.
-51°C: Mt. Hotham freezes. Canberra Girl Guides begin selling Guide biscuits door to door.
-62°C: Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic. Penguins leave Antarctica. Canberra Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.
-73°C: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. People in Canberra put on a coat.
-114°C: Ethyl alcohol freezes. People in Canberra get frustrated when they can't thaw their kegs.
-183°C: Microbial life start to disappear. Canberra cows complain of farmers with cold hands.
-273°C: ALL atomic motion stops. People in Canberra start saying "Cold 'nuff for ya?"
-296°C: Hell freezes over. Canberra wins the soccer.

Funny Pictures

Junky junk

1. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
2. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
3. There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.
4. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
5. When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
6. An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
7. Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

Funny bumper stickers

1. Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
2. I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
4. Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
5. Out of my mind...Back in five minutes.
6. Allow me to introduce my selves
7. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert....
8. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
9.Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mum?
10.You! Off my planet!
11. Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply
12. If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
13. Anarchy is better than no government at all.
14. Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

All these wonderful bumper sticker jokes are found at http://www.ahajokes.com/

Things that I didn't know.

1. Peanuts are one of the ingredients in dynamite.
2. Ants stretch when they wake up in the morning.
3. Recycling one glass jar saves enough energy to watch TV for 3 hours.
4. It's against the law to slam your car door in Switzerland.
5. Babe Ruth wore a cabbage leaf under his cap to keep him cool. He changed it every 2 innings.
6. A snail can have about 25,000 teeth.
7. The Eiffel Tower shrinks 6 inches in winter.

Australian facts

1. The Australian Coat Of Arms has on it a kangaroo and an emu. The reason for this is that the kangaroo and the emu cannot go backwards but can only walk forwards.
2.  Australia, founded by convicts. The homicide rate is in Australia is 1.8 per 100,000 of population. The United States was founded by religious zealots. It's homicide rate is 6.3 per 100,000. Almost 400% greater than Australia.
3. The venom of the Australian funnel-web spider can kill a person in less than an hour, and its fangs can bite right through a shoe.
4. Glenn King at the University of Queensland is studying the Blue Mountains funnel-web spider (Hadronyche versuta) with an eye toward developing eco-friendly pesticides. Proteins in this spider’s venom target the nervous system of insects but leave humans unharmed.
5. There are more than 150 million sheep in Australia, and only some 20 million people.
6.  Around 115 Australians per 100,000 of population are in jail. This compares with: New Zealand 155, UK 141, Germany 100, Spain 138, Canada 116, South Africa 400, USA 700.
7. The tropical north of Australia is home to the world’s largest species of crocodile, the salt water crocodile. These creatures are protected in Australia. Males can occasionally grow to lengths of over 6 metres (20 feet). Each year one or two people are eaten by crocodiles in Australia
8. Australia has the lowest precipitation of any of the world’s inhabited continents. (Antarctica gets less.) 70 percent of Australia gets less than 500 mm (20 inches) of rainfall per year
9. Nearly twenty million people now live in Australia, 95% of them on only 1% of the coastal land around continent. The entire middle parts of Australia are largely empty, so population density is calculated in square kilometers per person, not the number of people per square kilometer.

And nothing to do with Australia but still is interesting is.......
'Politics: “Poli” a Latin word meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures"'.

Useless facts

These are some useless facts you call tell to impress your friends.


1. Beetles tastes like apples, wasps like pine nuts, and worms like fried bacon!
2. A cockroach can live several weeks with its head cut off! 3. In 1386, a pig in France was executed by public hanging for the murder of a child!
4. Coca-Cola would be green if colouring wasn't added to it!
5. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath! 
6. You're born with 300 bones, but by the time you become an adult, you only have 206!
7. Some worms will eat themselves if they can't find any food!
8. The worlds oldest piece of chewing gum is 9000 years old!
9. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
10.  An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain!